Prisoners in the Woods

Waiting is holding us still; Eirwen long ago has taken herself out of matters of daily concern. To be sure, she is camping in the ‘going to the hospital bag’. She is not keen on missing the event. So we haven’t seen her much recently and so far she hasn’t become part of our daily lives. It’s a shame but I think it shows a serious degree of dedication to her ‘job’. She will want to start her life in the house as the baby-bear as opposed to ‘one of the bears’, like us, who happened to be around at the time. Valid point.

And what all this have to do with woods and prisoners? Well, nothing at all really. Nothing at all. If anything... I could say that while we wait members of the house get up to all kind of activities to kill time. No, that’s not true, we do not do such rituals as killing the time although metaphysically speaking it could be an interesting idea but probably impossible to peruse. Have to do something with living in organised society, I think just from the top of my head. All in all we do get up to have a bit of good time while we are waiting for the newest little one to be born. That is, the list of waiters on the having an easy time as follows: Tobi, Lili, Moses, Theodor, Elena – she is back from Vietnam, Mafalda, Hava and Gabor. We do find lots of fun while waiting. Eirwen and Jen are different though. I mentioned about Eirwen already. Jen... hm, she is just busy I guess.

Gabor took me to the woods outside Oulu last weekend and although I haven’t been his prisoner in a sense I became one. It was like some sort of initiation for me. Without the dancing around the fire. But there was fire. I read extracts from my writings to a bunch of others who are also into words. They are the other prisoners. Of words. It was pretty fun and I am sure you will hear more of them. Or perhaps not. I am kind of a quiet partner in the group but I had to mention about this experience. I like being in the woods. Maybe it’s a quality of being a bear. But I am going to get back to working on my other story now. It’s about the time I came to Oulu. I started writing it on the blog but I never got to finish so now I would like to write it all down in one piece. That will be fun!

Tic Toc

Waiting

Gabor doesn’t let me on the computer much these days. I cannot blog like this. But finally he has come to his senses. A lot of things have happened in the last three weeks or so...

A couple of weeks back we had a fairly exciting time in the house although not everyone. Lili and Moses slept through it like babies probably still resting out our great adventure to the far south, to Helsinki. I started sleeping well and comfortably as cuddling up in my armchair. I mean in Gabor’s armchair. I woke because Jen was wondering about and she was being visibly uncomfortable. Almost like you would expect a woman to be when in labour, early stages. She told me to get back to sleep there is nothing to worry about, it was just tricky things happening but the baby wasn’t coming yet and she mysteriously added ‘perhaps someone else’.

Trying to sleep hard as I could I couldn’t. Neither could she which was no wonder to me, Tobi was seriously over excited literally bouncing of the walls while Lili snored so hard that I could hear the neighbours downstairs moaning about it. Gabor slept like a baby while I wondered what if Jen was wrong? What if this night...

She woke him up eventually and I wasn’t comfortably snuggling up any longer, for me it was more an edge of the seat drama by then. But nothing extraordinary happened. He did some of the hand placing healing he does for Lili when she has a cut or bruise and he went back to sleep. He tried but he was excited too. Eventually though they both managed to fall back to sleep while Tobi and I disappointed as we were decided to play a game of 16. We were only half way through when there was a gentle knocking on the door. I wouldn’t have noticed if not for Tobi. His ears are even better than bears’. Scary.

Stupid he can get or maybe the late hour he thought and to be honest had me convinced quickly it was the baby coming. I must have been tired after the excitement and the lack of sleep. It wasn’t the baby of course knocking on the door. Eirwen the bear. She is a cousin of Moses until recently living up north, very north but now retiring to take care of Lili’s little sibling. She arrived at last.

We quickly cast aside our board game and made a nice cup of tea to welcome her. But she just went to sleep on the chair in the hall before it was ready. Probably being tired after the long journey...

Next morning Gabor decided Erwin’s arrival was a sing and he insisted on starting to make up the bag to take to the hospital. That was some 2 weeks ago and we are still waiting. And hopefully I will be allowed to use the laptop more regularly from now on.

IKEA

The day started early, earlier than usual compared to being on holiday. We got up to get the car which would take us out of town, all the way to Sweden. It was a shopping trip day driving a borrowed car. I was concerned all the way that I wouldn’t make it to the car, that I would be left behind and when Lili said that no, she couldn’t be bothered to take any bears to Sweden my hear sunk. But it was Ok because Gabor smuggled us into his bag. There was just enough room in there for Moses, Ted, me and a wallet with some essential plastic cards in it.

Before all of us set out though he spent some time cruising around Oulu, getting the feeling of the car as he said and picking up some commodities. Buggy, Sawing machine, a cup of coffee.

We left eventually and after a long and tiresome 1.72 hour drive we arrived. Nobody is used to sit in cars anymore. Not in this family. I was ok, but you should have heard them all moaning. It was tiresome.

IKEA was exciting and the hot-dog tasted just the same as it does in Glasgow. Or so I was told. Rubbish yet magnificent. A few items however which were on the priority, the top of the shopping list were out of stock and we were advised to get back in a couple of days. Ha-ha.


On the way home I thought something was different. About the car. It’s inside felt fuller than before and it wasn’t due only to the shopping. I sensed something in the boot but couldn’t put my finger on it. I fell asleep and I slept for the rest of the journey dreaming of magnificent fierce firey dragons, ancient places and pits someplace Indochina, the Carpathian basin.

I woke hours later, it was already dark outside, I mean that twilight dim what we call dark these days around 00:30. I was petrified with fear for I have never seen a real dragon in my life and now I woke because there was one right there much closer than I would appreciate during a first encounter. It was licking my face. My nose and gently chewing on my arm. ‘Hello’ she stopped on noticing I was awake ‘I’m Hava. Pleased to meet you!’ and a small puff of smoke left its nostrils. I tried to sit up, moving a bit away when another monster landed just behind me its enormous claws only millimetres from my delicate ears. ‘I apologise for her manners’ he said in a friendly tone and added ‘BythewayIamTobi’ he added in a quick breath then sneezed turning away quickly, sending a small fireball towards the kitchen sink. It was skilfully spanned landing in the steel tub, harmless. ‘You must be Lenard, I’m pleased to meet you, this is my daughter, Hava.’

Birthday

There is something peculiar about birthdays. I have been to a couple and some more since I came to Oulu and while participating in fascination I always came to realise that I do not understand this ritual.

On Friday for instance, last week it was Jen’s turn to officially turn a year older. Although I cannot see she has ‘grow’ in anyway in that one day.

Gabor and Lili kindly woke her with yummy orange juice, breakfast and some small presents. Surprisingly there was no card involved which seemed odd to me only because card, greeting cards especially for birthday seem to be a European minimum for such days. After an easy morning everyone got ready, bag packed and we, we set out. I was most surprised to get in the bag but of course I didn’t object.

We cycled to the museum of modern arts downtown Oulu where we spent some time fascinated. Especially Lili who probably thought in every room at first that whatever was there was truly interesting. For about 25 seconds. By then Jen and Gabor caught up with us and we were bored of the exhibits so we started playing catch. I flew higher and higher towards the ceiling and apart from a couple of occasions Lili caught me with skill. Once or twice only she managed to poke my eye but fortunately they made of hard plastic.

Our fun lasted until the receptionist who apparently was spying on us came upstairs and stormed into the room. Our anticipation has ample time to rise while she reached us at the middle of the room. She had about 8 meters to cover. Which may not sound much to you but should you be only a foot tall it would look very different.

She had a problem with us having fun at the museum. She thinks people should not enjoy themselves at museums and anyway, kids should just ... or it seemed she said as I was reading between the lines. Gabor and Jen got upset and also stunned with the rudeness of the lady. And her stupidity. We left shortly and saying that I just realised I have been straying of the subject.

We had a picnic in the park. Gabor had the wonderful idea of crossing a stream using the stepping stones rather than the bridge. I stayed out of it, so did Jen and was the better for us. The other two got soaked. Lunch was nice and the birds were fairly polite. With a full tummy, and I mean full here, Jen decided that there would be nothing better than walking across town in the warm sunshine, being very really pregnant an’ all. There was a shop there which might have some fun stuff to sell. After walking so long of course we all felt obliged to buy something. And eventually it was wonderful to get home.

So there went the day and it was nice. Appreciating the importance of a person in one’s life, celebrating the life of that person and being happy for her. Noble gestures they are but doing so such while reminding the celebrant that ‘hehe, you are older now!!!’ I think is a bit cruel. Loose the numbers, the candles on the cake, the fixed date next time people and just throw a party or have a nice day with loved ones on any random day. I bet they would feel more special that way.

And one more thing! If you live in Oulu eat out at the Persian restaurant! I heard it is amazing!

In the Forest

Shortly after midsummer it was time for me to take off for a while. I decided that I am old enough and I think I was much inspired by all the other young learning peoples around Oulu. Buggering off for the summer. I left against all of Gabor’s recommendations. No matter how vividly he recounted me our first encounter... I thought and I still think I am a lucky bear, especially because of our meeting so I was sure, and I was sure rightly it would be just fine. I felt invincible!

Answering the calling of the wild I hopped off the train at Rollo, Rovaniemi on its official name, and hitched a ride with a friendly reindeer farmer further north into the wilderness. I spent the night in the barn and early morning set out to find them wild bears. Eventually I did and my joy was great but it came to a quick surprise. Wild bears at first are never so friendly as grumpy old Moses or Theodor Junior. In fact they gave me quite a harsh welcome. An ice cold one in fact as I quickly landed in the river.

Eventually I learnt to swim and becoming friends with Jaakko and Leonid – who is an illegal immigrant by the way so I am not using his real name here – at the end proved easier than expecting after their surprising welcome. They don’t have TV you know. In fact they don’t really have much of anything out there so sitting around our imaginary campfire in the evenings they listened endlessly to my stories from the south, from the amazing, great cosmopolitan metropolis by the name Oulu. Of course I must say that I may have gotten carried away and my recounts and description became a bit tall. I think at certain parts they begun to suspect but fortunately neither Leonid nor Jaakko cared much. It was a welcome change of scenery.

Maybe you should wonder about one thing; why imaginary campfire? But the explanation is simple. I am mostly made of slightly flammable and meltable fabric so I prefer not to handle fire as such. While bears in general are not so much into making campfires for usually they are not cold meanwhile this time of the year it doesn’t really get dark unless it’s really rainy. If cold Bears I think usually reach for a crude form of geothermal heating. Environmentalist from whom we shall learn much.

At the end I realised that I am who I am. A bear. An urban Bear who was not created for life in the wild. Simple as that and who helped me to learn that? Mosquitoes. Millions of them. Although I have not the blood to suck they tried and tried and tried and circled around my head till I had enough. One could ask if I feel defeated and I would have to admit that yes, I do. But one could ask also have I learnt anything from this trip about myself, my place or better said aspirations in this life and I would answer hell yeah! It was wonderful coming home, seeing those familiar places and telling the stories from the wild. Some gotten a bit more colourful I guess but they, Lili, Gabor, Jen and Itchy didn’t seem to mind. Moses is convinced that one day I will grow to be a great story teller. Maybe he is right. It will be for the benefit of you who are reading these lines.

Midsummer

This is midsummer weekend. Sunday night to be exactly precise. It was nice for everyone. We, the bears in the house decided that we should experience the midsummer weekend in the appropriate Finnish way. Although we haven’t managed to leave town as by the time Ted came up with the idea all public transportation across Scandinavia seized to operate and we don’t own a car: we stayed.

There was no problem however because luckily Jen, Gabor and Lili spent most of Saturday at a friend’s in town. Our Finnish celebration didn’t cause problems for them. We started on wine than moved on to Whisky which we stole from Gabor’s stash that he got from a friend who have left town for somewhere sunnier. He doesn’t drink it anyway. It was very relaxed actually. I suppose Moses and Theodor Junior aren’t the kind of bears anymore who are totally up for great wild parties.

We talked a lot sipping away on our drinks and slipping away from our cognitive abilities. Lot of talk on shamanic practices, the neo-pagan movement, which by the way most bears have a low opinion on and somehow we even got into politics. I lost track of topics and arguments after a while. In fact I lost track of pretty much everything after a while and by the time our humans were home we were out. Completely out.



We spent the day, the hangover sitting on the windowsill chilling, looking out and trying not to move. Head still hurts a bit.

We planning on staying up tonight and have some other kind of celebration. This I believe is more appropriate considering tonight is the shortest night anyway. One thing I don’t understand however and that is the general name in many countries, especially ones with an appropriate Catholic history. Even Finland calls midsummer something like St John the Baptist day (Johannus). We have been speculating about this but haven’t come up with anything useful. I think. Moses maybe has had some great ideas but we forgotten most of them. Can only recall everyone going ‘oh yeah!’ and ‘AHA’ when he explained. Oh well.


An advice to all is to take celebrations without overindulging in anything. A beer for a bear is enough.

Learning

It was a smashingly interesting day yesterday. Well, not only yesterday but that is the first thing in my head right now. I went to work with Gabor. He took me around for the day and I got to learn all about cleaning. It was fascinating. Although having the day to think about the experience I realise that I am lucky that I don’t have to go to work with him or just go to work myself even every day. Cleaning saunas, stairs and laundry rooms day after day probably is boring. I understand now why he is so so keen on his upcoming holiday and why he is so much looking forward to start at uni. Both will be welcome changes from his work. Especially that he hasn’t chosen cleaning as his career. It’s just a way to make ends meet. I wonder though if there is anyone in the world who being a child dreams of becoming a cleaner? Probably not.

I started reading an interesting book; it’s called 9 to 5 Shaman. I know some about shamanism since Gabor told me that along with Moses and Ted I do have a shamanic role. He hasn’t specified this as yet to me and I think I am starting to understand why. He is expecting me to ask questions on the topic or generally on anything that I am interested in. He will teach whatever is needed and whatever he can as long as there is listening intent. There is plenty of interest on bears’ role in the family from my side but he is holding back telling me about it. I think maybe he would think first I should find things out for myself. I’m fine with that for now.

This book however that I started on troubles me a bit to begin with. I picked it up because all other books on the topic are used by either Jen or Gabor now and whenever I get the chance to get to the computer I need to check up on my facebook account so I don’t have the chance to research on the net. Anyway, so far my understanding is that shamanic thinking, world view is a rather practical one and this book – by the title – at first seemed to be an even more practical explanation but then the author keeps telling about, referring to some great spirit or god type character. I find it odd. I suspect she is some sort of neo-pagan and that’s why even writing a practical guide to urban shamanic practice she refers so much to something that is actually irrelevant to the topic. Oh well.

But it is time I write about arriving to Oulu where I reside with my human family.

We all knew that this final stretch of the journey in the truck was fairly short in comparison to the two journeys on boat coming to Finland yet it still felt infinitely long. We were nearly there, nearly and much nervous talk and joking lingered in the air yet they didn’t make time fly any quicker.

After some long time that felt like 3 or 4 separate eternities but at least hundreds of eons something happened. Recalling the event I believe that our truck must have just narrowly avoided a road accident. Our box fell down and got even more bashed and torn. I fell out and ended up lying close, too close to the door. I haven’t realised yet that I can make use of my arms and legs so I just lay there motionless very, very concerned.

In a little while the truck stopped and the driver came to the back. Opening the door he carefully examined the thrown about boxes, probably swore some under his nose but my Finnish fortunately isn’t good enough to know for sure and he slammed the door shut. We listened to his steps quieting as he moved to the front, the driver’s door opening and shut again. We started moving and the door swung open! As we turned back on to the road I rolled towards the opening and at the first bump I rolled out form the carriage and would have fallen on the ground but some instinct helped me to catch after something, anything.

I managed but couldn’t hold on and slid down. I fell again and caught on to another part of the vehicle much closer to the road and the wheels now. I was too far from the door to climb back. Within a minute we stopped again, at this time on the side of the road instead of a service station. The driver quickly closed the door where I fell out, he didn’t hear my shouting because of the oncoming traffic. I didn’t know how much longer before Oulu and I didn’t know if my arms could hold till we get there. I’ve started crying.